I'M IN OZ!!

(Theme song for post: Medley of Wizard of Oz songs)

I would have posted sooner but I just regained consciousness. Friday night I was watching FOX news and by the end of the broadcast I was being lifted off my feet and spun into the air by a twister. Below are the elements that came together during the show to cause the perfect storm:

WHAT??!! The voters of California voted 52% against gay marriage but on May 26 the CA Supreme Court may overturn the voters’ decision. Okey-dokey, now. Let’s see if I’ve got this right. Liberal judges can trump a legit election.

EXCUSE ME?? In her holier-than-thou voice, with her lips stretched tightly over her capped teeth, Nancy Pelosi dismissed the press as if they were annoying gnats, declaring, “I am not answering any questions on that subject.” I guess the press and the Republicans are going to let her get away with her damnable lies. (The Wicked Witch is here in Oz....I can’t get away from her!)

YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING!! Henry Waxman and the Dems hired a speed reader to read the massive 946 page climate bill in case the Republicans “force the issue” by demanding that the bill be read. Yeah, it’s 946 pages as well as several hundred pages of amendments being forced down our throats. A speed reader? They are making a mockery out of the legislative system and it’s a slap in the face to “We, the People.’ The Republicans could take that clip of the speed reader and beat the Democrats over the head with it in the 2010 elections. Will it happen?

WHAT CHUTZPAH! The White House is shutting out the press by allowing media coverage at events for only a few minutes, if at all. The White House is airing their own coverage of events on Youtube. Yep, they can edit those pieces to let you see and hear only what they want you to see and hear.

GASP! Ex-con, ex-teacher Mary Kay Letourneau and her boy-toy husband, Vili Fualaau are hosting “Hot for Teachers Night” at a Seattle nightclub. He’s the DJ and she’s the hostess. How disgusting!

Sadly, all the above was in ONE NEWS BROADCAST! Beam me up, Scottie, I don’t want to go home. You’ll find me in Oz.

DOROTHY THE PREZ

GOVERNMENT MOTORS

(Theme song for post: Little GTO)

Government Motors CEO, Barack Obama, has decreed that by 2016 all cars and light trucks will be powered by rubber bands. Left turns will be forbidden and car color choices will be limited to black, coal black and midnight black.

Say bye-bye to your favorite sports car.











Here's the car we'll all be driving in the future.




And....gasp......factoring in inflation, this little beauty will cost you only $50,000.







If I have to drive that, then this should be his new presidential limousine!






The Prez

THE SECOND AMENDMENT - PART I

(Theme song for post: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly)

The day after BO was elected last year one of our Florida members and her husband joined the NRA. This is a picture of her NRA sticker placed over a “W” campaign sticker from 2004. Neither Virginia or her husband own a gun but they felt it was necessary to join forces with a group that will fight to protect our right to bear arms.

Another member, Marcia from Missouri, joined the NRA and has just completed a conceal carry course. Watch this video and then tell me Marcia should not be allowed to carry a handgun in her purse if she chooses. Dr. Suzanna Gratia-Hupp tells U.S. Senators what it was like in Luby’s Cafeteria that day in Texas in 1991 when a madman began shooting at people like fish in a barrel and took the lives of 24. Go HERE to hear her testimony.


One night about two months ago our house security alarm startled us out of a deep slumber at 3 AM. I was petrified. My NRA member husband (who has a conceal carry license) got out of bed, got his gun and went from room to room in our house. He encountered no one but there’s no doubt in my mind he would have killed an intruder if there had been one. Take a look at this video telling what happened to a man in the U.K. who had a gun in his home and used it to protect himself and his property. I do not want this to happen to one single person in this country trying to protect their family. The British have something to say to Americans. We better wake up, listen and take action. Take a few minutes and go HERE for the message!


HR45 Blair Holt’s Firearm Licensing and Record of Sale Act is in committee in the House right now. To own a gun it would require you to have a Federal license with other strings attached. If you had children under 18 the government could...gasp...enter your home to check to make sure your guns are stored properly. That’s giving way too much power to the Federal government. My question would be this. WHO IS GOING TO MAKE THE BAD GUYS COMPLY WITH THE LAW?

The Prez

GASPING FOR BREATH

(Theme song for post: Every Breath You Take)

This is your Prez back in action, for now at least. Thank goodness for the second in command who stepped in when I went wobbly in the knees and hid under the covers. BO should be so lucky! Look who he’s got as his #2.........Joe Trigger Tongue Biden who tells the nation he wouldn’t let anybody in his family travel for fear of getting the “Piggy Wiggy Flu.” (Caution: Pause the music before clicking on the link.)

I just received an email from a member in Colorado. She’s as frustrated as I am. Are you all in this state of mind? Here’s her email:

.....I’m loving your GASP postings! Makes me want to start riots!!!!!!!! Our situation is dire in this country and no one is listening. With the media on ‘their side’ we are out numbered and out blitzed...........We were at a dinner party last Sunday with retired doctors and nurses from our local area. All were conservative. The overall consensus was that there’s not much anyone can do. When I said I was about ready to start calling TV and radio stations when I disagreed with their analysis, they said they knew of two doctors who complained who were dogged by the IRS for years. WHAT?

I’m talking to the ladies I walk with, trying to get their ire up as much as mine. We think if there are enough of us calling and emailing it won’t hurt. How frustrating! Doesn’t anyone really get it? Do you have to be 60 something to catch on? Any ideas for more rebel rousing across the nation?

Gasping for Breath
Claudette C



I’m gasping for breath along with Claudette. What can we do?

I had been out from under the covers for barely 5 minutes when the news broke that Justice Souter was leaving the bench. I saw a vision of BO grinning from ear to ear prancing around the Oval Office shouting, "HERE COME DE JUDGE, HERE COME DE JUDGE." Too bad Flip Wilson is dead and BO can't appoint him to the court. He could have joined Nancy Wicked Witch of the House Pelosi, Barney the Drag Queen Frank, Tim Keebler Elf Geithner, and starring Don Corleone Obama in the remake of "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest in Washington D.C."



HEY, BO

Every breath you take
Every smile you fake
Every move you make
Every vow you break
We'll be watching you.

O can't you see
How much we disagree
And our poor hearts ache with every step you take.

Every single day
Every word you say
Every game you play
Every time you stray
We'll be watching you.



THE PREZ

P.S. Gasp.....I think I just discovered the theme song for our group. We'll take a vote on it at the next meeting.

WHILE THE PREZ IS BUSY...

(Theme song for post: Mad, Mad World)

...frantically searching for the proper chair, I'm going rogue and entering a couple thoughts on Obama's speech:

"Even as we clear away the wreckage of this recession, I have also said that we cannot go back to an economy that is built on a pile of sand - on inflated home prices and maxed-out credit cards, on overleveraged banks and outdated regulations that allowed the recklessness of a few to threaten the prosperity of us all," said the President.



"ONE key pioneer of ACORN's subprime-loan shakedown racket was Madeline Talbott - an activist with extensive ties to Barack Obama. She was also in on the ground floor of the disastrous turn in Fannie Mae's mortgage policies." - New York Post September 29, 2008 - so WHO'S been reckless???


The president opened by promising Americans that his government was doing "everything we can" to counter the spread of swine flu, which the World Health Organization classified Wednesday as a category 5 emergency, the second-highest level.



OK - "his" government?



He ruled out, for now, closing the southern U.S. border with Mexico, where the outbreak originated. He likened such measures to "closing the barn door after the horses are out, because we already have cases here in the United States."



Wait a minute - I thought just a paragraph or two before you said you were "doing everything we can" to counter the spread?



Until the picture becomes clearer, Obama said, his best advice was what doctors had been telling Americans for days: Wash your hands regularly and stay home if you are sick.



I hear the angels singing - THERE'S the solution - just wash your hands and this nasty category 5 emergency is taken care of !!





Hmmmm...if washing your hands gets rid of all the nasty stuff, would washing O's mouth out with soap get rid of all the crap that spews from it?





OK, I'm done. Anyone heard from the Prez lately??

SOS/Editor/Grunt

GET A ROPE!

(Theme song for post: Mad, Mad World)

We have formed such a close bond over these last few months that the SOS and I know we can give you a glimpse into our personal lives. Do you feel the pain that we feel? I don't know about you but I'm about to cave. My head is getting bloody banging it against the increasingly hard liberal wall. Is there anybody left who really gives a flip about the future of this country?

These are the contents of actual emails that flew back and forth today between your Prez and your Secretary of State/Blog Manager/Editor/Grunt.

12:43 CDT - FROM THE PREZ TO THE SOS:

I was out running errands when I heard on the radio that Specter has changed parties. What the bleep is going on here??? Granted, he always acted like a Dem, but to change parties after all those years. I'm about ready to give up and take a vow to be blissfully ignorant of anything that's going on. Can you imagine if Bush's administration had that plane fly low over NY??? I'm resigning from GASP and becoming a recluse.

12:56 CDT - HER REPLY:

Funny you should say that. I told Dave this morning after the Specter thing that I give up - let the inmates run the nut house: Pass all the crap they want, dig the country deeper in debt, ban cars, gay up marriages, tax the hell out of us - maybe after all that somebody will get a large clue as to whom the real idiot is - OBAMA (aka known as the Front for Soros, Pelosi, Reid, and the Chicago Machine).

Gals, we've only endured the first 100 days of this nightmare. How can we make it through to the end? How? Never mind...I've found a rope...now I'm looking for a chair and someone to kick it out from under me.

THE PREZ

SINGERS, CELEBS & SYCOPHANTS

(Theme song for post: Pata Pata)

Miriam Makeba passed away last November. I hadn’t thought about her in years. Her “Click” song from the early ‘60's was a huge hit. How does she sing and make that click sound at the same time? What do Makeba and Obama have in common? Answer: Beautiful voices and a slick, smooth delivery but you can’t make sense out of a word they say! You will not be sorry if you order, “Miriam Makeba - Africa,” from www.amazon.com for only $6.99.....I listen to it constantly. (I know, I know.....at one time she was married to Stokley Carmichael but I forgive her...I have a friend who was BFF with Carmichael when they were teenagers...but, I digress.) For those members who have sucked up to me and sent your Prez gifts, you might want to hold off ordering. You may get a surprise in the mail. What can I say? Yes, your Prez has accepted gifts and now I’m returning favors. Is there anybody out there who can’t be bought? At our next meeting you will have the chance to vote me out of office...gasp...if you think I’m not worthy to continue leading our group.

Did you watch “Kennedy Center Honors” last December? We should give kudos to the selection committee. Ms. Barbra Streisand was an honoree in the last year of the Bush administration and had to go to the White House to make nice and kissy-kiss with George Bush. Don’t you know she was royally ticked off that she couldn’t be one of the first to be honored by her beloved BO? Psssst.....Babs....SOMEBODY RAINED ON YOUR PARADE!

Here’s a brilliant quote from Debra Messing, of “Will and Grace” fame, talking to reporters about BO: “...our new president is not only meeting my expectations, but going far beyond. He is thoughtful and considerate and he gets all the information before he speaks which I think is a wonderful quality for the ruler of the free world to have.” What a ditz!

Then we have the consummate idiot, Janine Garafalo, stating last week that the tea parties were all about racists who hate having a black man in the White House. She said we were confused and angry, called us teabagging rednecks whose limbic brain is larger than that in a reasonable person. Janine is another perfect candidate to be the Scarecrow in The Wizard of Oz.......if she only HAD a brain!

Hey, Babs, Janine, Brad and Denzel. You do know that BO has capped certain exec salaries at $250,000, don’t you? I think your income should be limited to $250,000 a year, also. No more ripping off the public for concerts and no zillion dollar movie and TV deals. Obscene wealth is so yesterday!

The Prez