WHILE THE PREZ IS BUSY...

(Theme song for post: Mad, Mad World)

...frantically searching for the proper chair, I'm going rogue and entering a couple thoughts on Obama's speech:

"Even as we clear away the wreckage of this recession, I have also said that we cannot go back to an economy that is built on a pile of sand - on inflated home prices and maxed-out credit cards, on overleveraged banks and outdated regulations that allowed the recklessness of a few to threaten the prosperity of us all," said the President.



"ONE key pioneer of ACORN's subprime-loan shakedown racket was Madeline Talbott - an activist with extensive ties to Barack Obama. She was also in on the ground floor of the disastrous turn in Fannie Mae's mortgage policies." - New York Post September 29, 2008 - so WHO'S been reckless???


The president opened by promising Americans that his government was doing "everything we can" to counter the spread of swine flu, which the World Health Organization classified Wednesday as a category 5 emergency, the second-highest level.



OK - "his" government?



He ruled out, for now, closing the southern U.S. border with Mexico, where the outbreak originated. He likened such measures to "closing the barn door after the horses are out, because we already have cases here in the United States."



Wait a minute - I thought just a paragraph or two before you said you were "doing everything we can" to counter the spread?



Until the picture becomes clearer, Obama said, his best advice was what doctors had been telling Americans for days: Wash your hands regularly and stay home if you are sick.



I hear the angels singing - THERE'S the solution - just wash your hands and this nasty category 5 emergency is taken care of !!





Hmmmm...if washing your hands gets rid of all the nasty stuff, would washing O's mouth out with soap get rid of all the crap that spews from it?





OK, I'm done. Anyone heard from the Prez lately??

SOS/Editor/Grunt

GET A ROPE!

(Theme song for post: Mad, Mad World)

We have formed such a close bond over these last few months that the SOS and I know we can give you a glimpse into our personal lives. Do you feel the pain that we feel? I don't know about you but I'm about to cave. My head is getting bloody banging it against the increasingly hard liberal wall. Is there anybody left who really gives a flip about the future of this country?

These are the contents of actual emails that flew back and forth today between your Prez and your Secretary of State/Blog Manager/Editor/Grunt.

12:43 CDT - FROM THE PREZ TO THE SOS:

I was out running errands when I heard on the radio that Specter has changed parties. What the bleep is going on here??? Granted, he always acted like a Dem, but to change parties after all those years. I'm about ready to give up and take a vow to be blissfully ignorant of anything that's going on. Can you imagine if Bush's administration had that plane fly low over NY??? I'm resigning from GASP and becoming a recluse.

12:56 CDT - HER REPLY:

Funny you should say that. I told Dave this morning after the Specter thing that I give up - let the inmates run the nut house: Pass all the crap they want, dig the country deeper in debt, ban cars, gay up marriages, tax the hell out of us - maybe after all that somebody will get a large clue as to whom the real idiot is - OBAMA (aka known as the Front for Soros, Pelosi, Reid, and the Chicago Machine).

Gals, we've only endured the first 100 days of this nightmare. How can we make it through to the end? How? Never mind...I've found a rope...now I'm looking for a chair and someone to kick it out from under me.

THE PREZ

SINGERS, CELEBS & SYCOPHANTS

(Theme song for post: Pata Pata)

Miriam Makeba passed away last November. I hadn’t thought about her in years. Her “Click” song from the early ‘60's was a huge hit. How does she sing and make that click sound at the same time? What do Makeba and Obama have in common? Answer: Beautiful voices and a slick, smooth delivery but you can’t make sense out of a word they say! You will not be sorry if you order, “Miriam Makeba - Africa,” from www.amazon.com for only $6.99.....I listen to it constantly. (I know, I know.....at one time she was married to Stokley Carmichael but I forgive her...I have a friend who was BFF with Carmichael when they were teenagers...but, I digress.) For those members who have sucked up to me and sent your Prez gifts, you might want to hold off ordering. You may get a surprise in the mail. What can I say? Yes, your Prez has accepted gifts and now I’m returning favors. Is there anybody out there who can’t be bought? At our next meeting you will have the chance to vote me out of office...gasp...if you think I’m not worthy to continue leading our group.

Did you watch “Kennedy Center Honors” last December? We should give kudos to the selection committee. Ms. Barbra Streisand was an honoree in the last year of the Bush administration and had to go to the White House to make nice and kissy-kiss with George Bush. Don’t you know she was royally ticked off that she couldn’t be one of the first to be honored by her beloved BO? Psssst.....Babs....SOMEBODY RAINED ON YOUR PARADE!

Here’s a brilliant quote from Debra Messing, of “Will and Grace” fame, talking to reporters about BO: “...our new president is not only meeting my expectations, but going far beyond. He is thoughtful and considerate and he gets all the information before he speaks which I think is a wonderful quality for the ruler of the free world to have.” What a ditz!

Then we have the consummate idiot, Janine Garafalo, stating last week that the tea parties were all about racists who hate having a black man in the White House. She said we were confused and angry, called us teabagging rednecks whose limbic brain is larger than that in a reasonable person. Janine is another perfect candidate to be the Scarecrow in The Wizard of Oz.......if she only HAD a brain!

Hey, Babs, Janine, Brad and Denzel. You do know that BO has capped certain exec salaries at $250,000, don’t you? I think your income should be limited to $250,000 a year, also. No more ripping off the public for concerts and no zillion dollar movie and TV deals. Obscene wealth is so yesterday!

The Prez

WHEW!!

(Theme song for post: Shotgun Boogie)

I feel better now - Janet's got a GUN!! We ARE secure! No...wait...I'm NOT secure...gasp...it's ME she's hunting!! It's open season on RIGHT-WING RADICALS!!!! (That is, if you define a "right-wing radical" as a person concerned about the economy, who doesn't like Government spending money on ridiculous items labeled "stimulus," a pro-lifer who believes in God, and someone who believes the Constitution is the foundation of our country - not a document that needs to change with the times.)

TEA FOR TICKED?

(Theme song for post: Tea for Two)





TEXAS TEA PARTY!!!

I know that you would expect nothing less from your Prez than for me to show up at a Tea Party to represent every one of our loyal GASP members. I was there for you at Southlake Town Square in Southlake, Texas.


GASP members attending with me were Pat and Nancy.















It wasn't all women....check out these guys.









Too bad I didn't have a wide lens camera. This doesn't show the entire crowd.

Your Prez with the keynote speaker, Mark Davis, our local conservative talk radio personality. He subs for Rush once in a while. Next two times he'll be sitting in for Rush....April 24 and May 8.





I liked this sign.













After the crowd had gone, I got this picture of future conservatives. They are home schooled.....does that surprise anyone?











Only two of the dozen or so dissenters lingered long after it was over. Poor, misguided soul....reminds me of the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz. "If I only had a brain."





I was interviewed by a reporter. She asked me, "Why are you here?" I said, "I have never demonstrated or protested in my life but I am angry. I want to send a message to Washington that somebody better get a hold of the reins of this run-away horse of a government before it goes over the cliff." I should have added this: "Janet Napolitano and Homeland Security, here I am...gasp...a Right Wing Extremist. Come take me away in handcuffs before I hurt somebody with my umbrella."

The Prez

P.S. Because I was seen on a couple news broadcasts yesterday and mentioned on the radio, at our next meeting we will need to negotiate a hike in my salary.

SPRINGTIME FOR THE OBAMAS

(Theme song for post: Springtime for Hitler)

MICHELLE, MY BELLE, HOW DOES YOUR GARDEN GROW?
WITH PORKULUS BILLS AND TAX CHEATING SHILLS
AND A HUSBAND WHO'LL TAKE ALL YOUR DOUGH!

THE PREZ


(This post is dedicated to "Mary, Mary Quite Contrary," a faithful GASP member from Phoenix, who requested a post about the new White House vegetable garden.)

STICKS AND STONES!

(Theme song for post: Turkey Gobbling Sounds)

“STICKS AND STONES MAY BREAK OUR BONES, BUT "DEM" WORDS MAY ACTUALLY HARM US...”

No more can we say, “war on terrorism.” It’s now OVERSEAS CONTINGENCY OPERATIONS.

No more can we say, “acts of terrorism.” By the direction of the Homeland Security Secretary, Janet Napolitano, it’s now MAN-CAUSED DISASTERS.

No more can we say “enemy combatants.” They haven’t decided what to call them but my money is on PESKY PRANKSTERS.

Obama said the North Korean missile launch is PROVACATIVE. Huh? Have I missed something? Did satellite pictures show the missile was wearing...gasp...pasties and a g-string?

BO and his cohorts lack the will to be tough in their language. Do you have confidence they will be assertive in their actions should we be challenged by any of those rascally “pranksters?”

What’s next? Do they think the eagle is too representative of power and strength on the Great Seal of the United States of America? Hey, I have an idea! Why not change the symbol from an eagle to a turkey? Here's factual info on the turkey: “Domestic turkeys are weak, they are fat, they are not agile, they can’t run very fast and they can’t fly. All of this makes it more difficult for them to survive on their own in an unprotected environment so when something unusual occurs they tend to panic. Frenzied, they will usually run as best they can until they reach a corner fence or some other barrier to progress. Even then they may continue their efforts to escape, piling onto each other suffocating those at the bottom of the heap.”




Yep, that about sums up this bunch. I have a feeling they will be diving under the bed if the big, bad wolf comes knocking on our door. They will be so very disappointed that nice words didn’t keep the wolf at bay.


The Prez